The PET Scan

I went in today for the PET scan, which was an interesting experience, I wasn't really sure what to expect.

Basically they shot me up wtih the radioactive 'stuff' then had me sit in a darkened room for 45 minutes while it circulated. No reading, talking, texting, anything, just sitting quietly. It honestly would have made for a nice nap if I'd had a pillow provided to me.

The way it works is the radioactive dye will basically 'collect' anywhere energy is being expended in the body, so if you're braining, it's going to collect in your brain, and if you're walking? Your leg muscles I guess? At least that's how it was explaiend to me.

After my 45 minutes they did the scan, the machine is kind of like a bit CT scanner with a long tube. Holding still was the hardest part, one of my arms wasn't in a very good position.

I expected the results to be next day at least, but they came in tonight.

Moderate metabolic activity in the breast where the tumor is.

Hypermetabolic activity in the lymph node we know has a tumor.

Mild metabolic activity in the pectoral chain. The report says that could be a result of my body trying to fight cancer, or that it could be cancer. There's no way to really tell.

That's the one that has me worried though. If there's cancer in more lymph nodes, I'm 99% sure I'm headed for chemo.

I'm feeling pretty OK about this one and while I was debating having some one go with me to talk to the surgeon Friday, I'm ready. I can handle this one.

More Tests & Doctors

The scheduling nurse called today to set up my PET scan and appoinment with the surgeon. Both are happening next week.

The PET scan is done to determine what, if any spread there is of the breast cancer through the rest of my body. They won't be able to tell what stage breast cancer I have until they've done this scan.

I've heard of this scan through TV, so I kind of knew what it was used for, but not the details. I'll be there for about an hour and a half.

I talk to the surgeon next Thursday.

They're moving quickly. I'm so grateful for that.

I did tell them I have trip to DC coming up in mid-June for one of my classes.  I'm hoping I'll still be able to do that. They did say we might be able to work around it.

I understand cancer vs. class. One is far more important and takes priority over the other.

Mental Health Crutches

I had three panic attacks on Tuesday. I've managed to hold off any more with an almost manic desperation.

I had my appointment with my GP and she asked how I'm doing. I told her. It's too much right now to try and process, and panic attacks aren't helping. I need to be able to function.

I have generalized anxiety, but usually I have it under control. Anxiety typically just manifests as me picking at my cuticles or falling into OCD habits that make my brain happy.

Right now, they are barely in control.

I need the crutches right now, or I'll lose it.

I asked if there was anything I can take short term to help with anxiety/panic attacks. Yes. There is.

Thank god.

Understanding My Cancer

So yesterday I received the biopsy report from the tissue samples. Today I talked to one of the breast cancer survivors at work who helped me to go over and understand what the report said. I'm pretty proud of myself though, I understood about 75% of it going in. I appreciate the candidness and support.

Estrogen positive, progesterone positive, and HER2 negative.

Estrogen and Progestrone positive means the cancer feeds off those hormones.  I guess it's a good thing I hadn't started IVF and that I'm not pregnant.

But it also means never getting pregnant. In all likelihood, it means at some point being on treatments to stop my body from produncing those hormones.

This, from what I am understanding, is the most common type of breast cancer.

It doesn't make it any less devastating on an emotional level.

There's still adoption... right?

I am Groot Cancer

The biopsy site has been itching horribly, but it's finally hit the 5 day mark, so I can take it off. I can't unsee Groot in this.

It looks like I may have a sensitivity to the adhesive they used.  Joy!