Tuesday, May 16, 2023

Random Schedule Drops

Things started showing up on my calendar last night and I went into meltdown mode. I called trying to get answers, but all I could do was leave a message.

They have me starting chemo June 2nd. I haven't had the MUGA scan, or port installed.

Talk about anxiety being triggered. I like to have things nice and ordered on my calendar. I'm not a fan of 'unknowns' like this. What is going on?

I also talked to a therapist this morning, and I've realized three things that are going to be extremely hard for me:

  • I'm going to have to accept help from others
  • I'm going to have to learn to ask for help when I need it
  • I'm going to have to give up some control over my schedule

Anyone who knows me knows I have an independent streak.

I can do this. I just have to breathe.

What the hell is going on with this chemo schedule?

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